BLACK DOG: Clegg can walk through walls!
00:35 GMT, 23 December 2012
One of Nick Clegg's perks in his Cabinet Office base is use of the 'secret' door
One of Nick Clegg’s perks in his Cabinet Office base is use of the ‘secret’ door between the building and No 10 – the one famously locked shut in Yes, Prime Minister to annoy Sir Humphrey Appleby.
But what will happen when the Deputy PM is shortly forced by renovation works to relocate to the Scotland Office next door
Simple. Dog hears workmen will punch a hole in the wall into the Cabinet Office and thus maintain Cleggie’s ‘street-free’ access to No 10. Well, we wouldn’t want him to get his hair wet now, would we
Dissident Tory MPs determined to give David Cameron a bloody nose fluffed their chance.
As the Prime Minister closed his pre-Christmas address to the party’s 1922 Committee of backbench MPs, chairman Graham Brady asked: ‘Right. Any questions’ Before any rebellious hands could be raised, Dave seized his chance. ‘No OK – let’s all go to the Smoking Room for a drink!’ he said, before charging off into the night.
Armchair critic Freya left feline friendless
Freya the cat knows when to make herself scarce
Like Macavity the Mystery Cat, George Osborne’s moggie Freya always knows when to make herself scarce.
But here she is – caught trying to sneak past the door of No 11 Downing Street on the Chancellor’s Christmas card, which Mr Osborne sent to close friends.
But will that include Craig Oliver The No 10 media chief is still sore after feline villain Freya took a shine to his armchair and used it as a litter tray.
Tony Blair looks in good nick for a man nearing 60 – but at a price.
The image-conscious former PM opted for no glasses addressing a hacks’ lunch last week.
The catch He had to write his notes, Gordon Brown-style, in 2in-high lettering.
One appreciative member of the audience was David Cameron’s pregnant aide Gabby Bertin. The PM described her as a ‘traitor’ for attending, albeit with a smile on his face.
Any airline passenger who strides down the aisle with a dagger can expect to be arrested.
But David Cameron got away with it when he jokily flashed a ceremonial dagger given to him by the Sultan of Oman towards the political press pack on the return leg of his trip to Afghanistan and the Middle East.
‘We thought you had given up blood sports,’ wisecracked one hack.
El tea Brutus, by Gove
Labour MPs formed a guard of honour in the Commons Tea Room last week to salute long-serving caterer Gladys Dickson when she picked up her MBE.
Ghanaian-born Gladys looked chuffed. Less so Education Secretary Michael Gove, who walked in, saw a phalanx of Labour heavies armed with razor-sharp tea knives and yelled: ‘Is this my Ides of March’
Fitting, since some wonder whether Govey will play Brutus to David Cameron’s Caesar if the polls don’t improve.
Some wonder whether Gove will play Brutus to David Cameron's Caesar if the polls don't improve
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The communist Morning Star impressed with its coverage of the Queen’s attendance at Cabinet.
The paper’s veteran political editor, Roger Bagley, reported how ‘Ms Windsor’ ‘gawped’, then mocked Her Majesty as a ‘fabulously wealthy monarch’ surrounded by ‘fawning Ministers’.
Off with his head, Dog says!